


The Hunt before Christmas

by Sammynator



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Case Fic, Castiel and Dean Winchester Need to Use Their Words, Christmas Fluff, Fluff, Human Castiel (Supernatural), Hunters & Hunting, Kissing, M/M, POV Dean Winchester, Post-Season/Series 15, SO MUCH FLUFF, Sam Winchester is exasperated, Sleepy Cuddles, actually beta´d because life is better together, brief angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-25
Updated: 2020-12-25
Packaged: 2021-03-10 16:26:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,031
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28320120
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sammynator/pseuds/Sammynator
Summary: Dean really looks forward to a peaceful, happy Christmas with his family - god is defeated and finally, they are free to be happy and together. Even if his relationship with Castiel is still... well, let´s say awkward. But of course there has to be a case a few days before Christmas and he decides to go check it out. And Cas decides to join him. And fate decides to provide them with some opportunities to finally get their shit together. Unhinged fluff with plot ensues.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Comments: 13
Kudos: 50
Collections: Destiel Secret Santa Exchange 2020





	The Hunt before Christmas

**Author's Note:**

  * For [NotfunnyDean (IronEyes)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/IronEyes/gifts).



> I had a blast writing this for NotfunnyDean in the Destiel Secret Santa exchange! Merry Christmas everyone!  
> Stay safe and I hope you have a wonderful time!

The Hunt before Christmas

Dean hummed a Christmas carol as he entered the kitchen. It was the 21st of December and the first year. The first year without a case, without an impending apocalypse, without grief weighing so heavy on his shoulders he thought he would suffocate. The first year to celebrate Christmas with his extended family. He smiled, gratefully and contentedly.

Sam sat at the table; a cup of coffee in one hand and the other on the keyboard of his laptop. Eileen stood behind him and had her arms wrapped around his neck. As Dean passed them by on his way to the coffee maker, he saw that they were browsing the same property agency´s site as the day before. Eileen pointed at a house and Sam clicked to read the details, both smiling softly and a little unbelieving.

Dean took a pan and started to make bacon and eggs, softly humming Metallica as he did so. When he turned around again, Cas stood beside Sam and signed a good morning to Eileen. A shiver ran through Dean as he saw the former angel so relaxed, in a T-Shirt and Sweatpants, a small smile on his face as he commented on the houses they were looking at. After he had pulled Castiel out of the empty, making him human in the process, he had told him that he loved him, too. He had pressed his lips to Cas´ in a desperate kiss and held him so tight he´d nearly crushed him. But after that, neither of them had known how to proceed. So, things had been awkward for a bit, neither knowing how to initiate another kiss or, god forbid, a conversation. They had continued mostly as before, maybe standing a bit closer to each other, hands brushing more often. Sometimes, when he felt brave, Dean pulled Castiel into a short hug when they were the last ones to go to bed after a movie night, or he´d ruffle his hair as he passed by in the morning. But Dean didn´t stay in range long enough for Cas to reciprocate, still too afraid of wanting too much, still too on edge about coming to terms with wanting Castiel to touch him. He stayed close, but not too close. With all the change happening, the pressure and purpose gone after god´s defeat, it was all he could handle.

Cas´ gaze met Dean´s across the room and the wrinkles at the corners of his eyes deepened as he smiled at him. Dean had to hold onto the counter as the realization that Castiel loved him back hit him again, overwhelming, and scary, and euphoric. He cleared his throat.

“Cas, can you tell Jack that breakfast is ready?”

“Of course, Dean.”

Dean´s eyes followed Castiel as he left the kitchen and avoided the half annoyed, half pitying look that Sam gave him. He turned around to get plates and glasses for orange juice.

***

The five of them were almost done with their breakfast as an alarm went off on Sam´s laptop. He frowned and scanned the page. His frown deepened and Dean set down his fork. He´d seen that expression a thousand times and a giddy, exited part of him made way for resignation. Some things would never change and getting rid of god would not rid the world of monsters. Maybe it was time to leave the actual hunting to someone else, but not quite yet.

“What´s up, Sammy?”

“Several cases of murders in Manitowoc, Wisconsin. Apparently, four people have disappeared on their way home from different festivities. Two have been found later, with severe wounds, but it´s not clear what caused these.”

“Hearts missing?”

“Don´t know, it´s not in the report.”

Dean sighed. “I´m gonna check it out.”

Sam closed his laptop, nodding. “We´ll leave in 15?”

“No, I´m going alone. You lot stay here and prepare the bunker for Christmas. If I don´t have a sock and a Christmas tree and eggnog and cookies ready when I come home, I´ll be your personal spirit of Christmas Yet to come and kick your ass.”

Sam grinned, but opened his mouth to argue. Cas was faster.

“I´ll come with you.”

Dean shuddered at the familiar words. The last time he´d heard them was the day he´d lost Cas to the empty. What if something happened? It seemed like an easy hunt, but what if something went wrong? He couldn´t lose Cas again, and now he was human and could get hurt or sick or ki…

“I think that´s a good idea.” Eileen seemed serious, but her eyes sparkled. “You can handle the hunt together and Sam, Jack and I will handle the Christmas decorations.”

Dean stared at her, then at Cas. “No, it´s fine, I can handle it alone, no big deal.”

“Dean, that´s bullshit. You two go on that hunt and be back in a few days, and if you can´t make it for Christmas, you won´t be alone. It´s a good plan, don´t be a jerk.”

“Who are you calling a jerk, bitch?”

Both brothers grinned at the familiarity of the bickering, then Dean turned towards Cas.

“You really want to come with me?”

Castiel rolled his eyes. “Yes, of course I do, Dean. I think I was pretty clear about that by now.”

Dean swallowed and nodded, ignoring that this was the closest they had come to actually talking about their, well, not-quite relationship.

“Well then, we leave in 30. Pack warm clothes, it´ll be cold in Wisconsin.”

***

“Did you not want me to come with you?”

Castiel´s blue eyes were so clear they seemed translucent, and Dean nearly drove them into a ditch as he lost himself in their openness yet again.

“Jesus, Cas. Of course I want you to come with me. I always do.”

Dean bit his tongue as the words slipped free. Awesome. Two hours into being alone with Cas and he already lost control over his mouth. This was going to be a long hunt. But the happy smile on Cas´ face when Dean dared to look at him again was totally worth it.

***

They arrived at the motel late at night. Slight snowfall and bitter cold greeted them as they left the car and Dean slipped on the icy ground as he made his way to the reception. Cas caught his arm and pulled him up again and for a second, they were so close that Dean stopped breathing. But Cas just smiled, asked if he was okay and took a step back when he was sure that Dean was steady again. He then walked up to the motel, his trench coat flapping behind him, snowflakes getting caught in his hair, and Dean could just stare dumbly, until a gust of wind reminded him that he was standing outside in the snowfall as well.

Dean hurried to catch up and they booked a room with two queens, at the far end of the motel. Dean went to get the bags while Cas went to check the room. They salted the windowsills and the threshold and Dean checked the news while Cas went to get dinner. While he was waiting, Dean checked the address of the next police department, the morgue and the names and addresses of the victim´s families. It was such a well-known routine that it calmed him a bit after the long drive and the constant flutter in his stomach that being close to Cas always caused.

Castiel returned and they shared pizza and beer while Dean explained their plan for the next day:

“We´ll get into our fed suits and check out the police department and the morgue. Also, we´ll check online and in the local bars if there are any parties planned tomorrow, if so, we´ll stay close and try to catch the thing, whatever it is, when it´s trying to attack again. We´ll salt and burn it, or behead it, or stab it, or whatever, and be home for Christmas.”

“Sounds like a plan.”

For a moment, they were both silent, munching on their pizza. But it was a comfortable silence and Dean relaxed into it. He heard the wind howling around the corners of the house and in the light of a lantern outside, he watched the snow fall. He smiled faintly. It could be worse.

“Do you like Christmas?” asked Cas.

Dean had to think about it and Castiel didn´t press, he just waited and scrolled a bit further on their news page.

Finally, Dean answered: “You know, we didn´t celebrate Christmas very often. When I was a kid, my dad wasn´t always there on Christmas. But the few times that we actually did celebrate were quite nice. When I was twelve, Sam gave me the necklace as a present. You know, the one that I gave to you when you”, he stopped there, suddenly remembering the purpose of the necklace.

“The one that can find god, I remember.” Cas just smiled; no tension suggested that the memory bothered him.

“Yeah, exactly, that one. Actually, that Christmas was pretty shitty, dad never showed up, I had to tell Sam the first bit about monsters being real, he was disappointed and cried the whole night before that… I actually stole a few presents, just so I had something to give to him, but they turned out to be girl stuff. He wasn´t happy.” Dean laughed and scratched his neck. “But I kept the necklace anyways.”

“I´m sorry it was like that. It wasn´t right, you two deserved someone to be there with you. You didn´t deserve the burden to be a parent to your brother.”

“Yeah, well”, Dean wanted to shrug it off, but again, his mouth had other plans. “I remember a bit of what Christmas was before, you know. Before our mom died. Nothing specific, just bits and pieces. A feeling of warmth and lights everywhere and just the general happiness that related to Christmas. I tried to give that to Sam later, but I was a kid and motel rooms aren´t made to be cozy and festive.” Dean gestured around him with a grin and Cas chuckled. Dean wanted to leave it at that, but again, he couldn´t.

“We had that one nice Christmas, even in a motel room. That was 2007, before… well, before I went to hell. Sam and I had a case and I wanted to celebrate, I mean, I thought it´d be the last time, you know. He didn´t want to at first, but in the end, we had a pretty decent evening. Eggnog and decorations and gifts and a game on TV. It was nice. Not as nice as Christmas with Mrs. Butters though.” Now both of them were laughing when they remembered the wood nymph, and the laughter left a warm feeling in Dean´s belly, that felt a little bit like Christmas, too. He grinned at Cas and the former angel grinned back, eyes sparkling and teeth showing, and Dean wanted to kiss him so badly it nearly hurt. But he didn´t dare to. But he lifted his hand and squeezed Cas´ shoulder before he leaned back and stretched his arms over his head.

“Let´s get ready for bed. Who knows how much sleep we´ll be able to catch tomorrow.” Castiel nodded, but as Dean got up to go to the bathroom to change, he caught his hand and held on. “This Christmas will be a nice one. And the next one, too. No more motel rooms or hunts or heartbreak. You still deserve that, Dean.” The hunter could only nod, the lump in his throat too big to talk.

Later, when they were lying in bed, Dean expected his thoughts to race and to keep him up for an eternity. But the sound of the calm, even breaths from the bed next to his lulled him to sleep faster than whisky had ever managed.

***

The police were very eager to help detectives “Hammet” and “Burton” and handed them the files without a second glance at their IDs. They also gave them the address to the morgue, where another helpful pathologist showed them to the victims and then left them to it. The monster obviously didn´t have a type, one of the victims was a woman in her forties who had come back from a working dinner that had taken longer and included more cocktails than expected. Another one was a seventeen-year-old boy who had come home from a LAN party in the early morning hours (there were obviously still people who did that). The other two had been a businessman who had been passing through this town and had spent his evening in the local bar, and a woman in her late twenties who had been born here and had been on a party at a friend´s house. They apparently had nothing in common except for the fact that they all had been at some kind of party before they died.

Dean checked their bodies and there were no hearts missing and the blood seemed to fit the wounds. There were bite marks, but it didn´t look like the attacker had killed them to eat the victims, there were no chunks of flesh missing. The teeth marks looked human, same size and same tooth marks. That was indeed strange, and he stayed silent, lost in his thoughts, while Cas and he ate lunch in the car. They turned up the heating and the radio and Castiel watched the people on the street, buying Christmas presents and decorations, sharing sweets, laughing and talking. Couples, parents with their kids and some people who roamed the streets alone, stopping every few steps to admire the shop windows. It was normal, and peaceful, and he suddenly felt a longing for a life like this, without the threat of injury and death looming over every job they took, without having to be ready to fight at all times, just the everyday worries of ordinary people. It was so strong he forgot to breathe for a second.

“Cas? Cas, are you okay?”

Castiel turned around and met Dean´s confused and worried eyes. His tone implied that he had been trying to get the former angel´s attention for some time.

“Yeah, I´m fine. I just … I just thought that it´d be nice to have a life like that.” Cas waved his hand in the general direction of the people outside the car. Then he huffed out a humorless laugh. “But I wouldn´t even know how that works. I don´t know anything besides … how to be a soldier. How to be violent. I don´t – “, Dean took his hand and cut short the self-deprecating monologue. “Cas, neither do I. But we will figure it out, okay? We´ll find something. Let´s just finish this job and then we´ll think about it.” Castiel just nodded mutely, his attention completely bound by “We will figure it out”, and Dean´s warm fingers wrapped around his own. Dean smiled and started the car, but after he pulled out of his parking spot, his hand found Cas´ again. Their fingers entwined, slowly, carefully, and Cas thought he could feel Dean´s racing pulse through his skin. But neither of them pulled away, their hands settled on the leather between them and when he glanced sideways, Cas saw that Dean smiled softly at the road ahead. Castiel leaned back and thought that he´d never been happier than here and now, driving down the snowy road, his thumb circling over Dean´s skin, the low hum of the Impala mixing with the sweet words of an Elvis song on the radio.

***

Questioning the relatives and colleagues of the victims didn´t provide them with any more leads on what kind of creature they had to deal with, or what the victims had in common, so they returned to the motel room and called Sam. The zoom call got accepted and they had a view of the war room. Fairy lights were wrapped around the handrail at the stairs and the columns in the room. Sam was breathing heavily, and he had fir needles in his hair, but his eyes were sparkling.  
  
“Hey guys, how´s it going? What are you up against?”

“Better question, what are you up against? And more importantly, will that fight with the forest spirits you´re apparently in finally make you cut your damn hair?”

Dean grinned and Sam rolled his eyes fondly. “No, jerk, I just carried the Christmas tree inside. You know, because someone threatened me with becoming the spirit of Christmas yet to come.”

Cas tilted his head, his forehead creased in worry. “But would you becoming a spirit not require you to die?”

Dean snorted. “Dude, no. It´s, uh, it´s a book reference. ´A Christmas Carol´. I thought Metatron uploaded all culture in your head?”

“Yeah, but my human brain can´t hold all of that information.”

“Oh. Yeah, I get that.” Dean rubbed his neck awkwardly. “I mean, it´s a movie, too, maybe we could watch it together?”

“Yes, I´d like that, Dean.”  
  


They smiled at each other, until Sam cleared his throat and shook his head in exasperation. Dean filled him in on their case and the lack of specific details on the kind of monster they were up against. Sam thought about it for a while and asked more questions, but he didn´t come up with a clear answer either.

“I guess your best chance is to find out where the next party and/or festivity takes place and go from there. Take a little bit of everything; salt, iron, silver, holy water, maybe even dead man´s blood, and see what happens. I think you should be able to handle it. I´m gonna do some research, maybe I´ll find something.” Sam looked at someone behind the screen and signed: “Dean and Cas. I´m gonna explain later.”

Dean smiled softly. “Do some research if you want, but I think we´ve got it. Have a good time and say hello to Eileen and Jack.”

Sam nodded, but his smile faded. “Be careful.”

“Yeah, we will.” Dean grinned. “It´s not like I´m gonna throw myself on a rusty nail and really become the spirit of Christmas. And all those sons of bitches should know better than pissing me off.”

Sam snorted. “Sure, whatever.”

A moment before Sam ended the call, Jack entered the frame with his hands full of Christmas tree decorations and fairy lights wrapped around his shoulders.

“Sam, where do these g-“

Dean and Castiel chuckled at the black screen. Then Dean stretched and smiled softly at the snow that had started to fall outside the window again. “How about we find out where we can attend a party tonight and then we´ll actually watch ´A Christmas Carol´, whaddaya say?”

Cas smiled widely. “That sounds good.”

It didn´t take long to find out that there was a “Yule Party” at the bar in town, to celebrate the Winter Solstice. They didn´t need a ticket and could just show up, which gave them not much to do for the next few hours. Dean went and got pizza and some weird stuff named “Glögg”, which turned out to be pretty sweet, but good nonetheless.

Dean and Castiel settled on one bed and put the laptop up on the lower end. They had pizza and Glögg on their nightstands and were sitting so close that their shoulders and thighs were touching, but it was comfortable and familiar. The movie was up and when they finished eating, their hands inched closer. Dean´s heart was racing, a part of him wanted to draw back, but it had been so freeing to hold Cas´ hand in the car that he couldn´t make himself. Instead, he held his breath and took a leap again, wrapping his fingers around Castiel´s, who immediately relaxed. Dean closed his eyes for a moment and let out a long sigh, his attention bound by the warmth of Cas´ body beside him and his strong, solid hand in his. The former angel moved a bit up again, tensed, and then, as if he´d made up his mind, he let his head sink lower and laid it on Dean´s shoulder. A soft smile spread over the hunter´s face and he rested his cheek on top of Castiel´s head. His soft hair smelled of the shampoo that they shared and tickled a bit at his ear, but he didn´t move away and neither did Cas.

The movie played with low sound. the light was dim as it grew dark outside and the wind picked up again and threw snowflakes at the window. Castiel´s thumb drew soft patterns on Dean´s skin. It was heaven on earth.

Both of them dozed for a while, content in their warm bubble of happiness, but it got late and they still had a party to attend. With a sigh, Dean opened his eyes and looked down at their intertwined hands. Before he could chicken out, he pressed a lingering kiss on Cas´ head. Castiel´s grip tightened, and Dean heard his shuddering inhale, but he didn´t move for another few seconds. Finally, he murmured in the other man´s hair:

“We have to get up. We still have to go to this party.”

Cas voice was quiet as he answered: “I know. But I´d rather stay here with you.”

Dean lifted his head and Cas looked up. Dean got lost in these blue, clear eyes he´d spent so many hours daydreaming about.

“Yeah, me too.”

They held each other´s gaze for long seconds. Dean saw Castiel´s eyes widen in wonder at his words and then flicker down at his lips for a brief moment before they met his again. And suddenly, he didn´t know anymore why they had continued to dance around each other even after everything was already in the open. He loved Cas. And Cas loved him. And they both knew it. There was no reason to hide anymore. So Dean lifted Cas´ head with a hand and closed the distance between them, heart beating out of his chest. Castiel held his breath as their lips brushed against each other, soft as flower petals. The brief contact sent a shiver through Dean´s whole body. This wasn´t born of desperation as their last kiss. This was just made of love. And finally, their mouths locked together.

All air left Cas´ body in a long sigh as he finally felt Dean´s lips against his own. Their mouths started to move against each other, cautiously, but not rushed, not hurried. The first time that Dean´s tongue flicked against his lips, Castiel thought that his newly gained soul was about to leave his body. He arched towards Dean´s body and pulled his head close with one hand and kissed him at if he was drowning and Dean was his saving breath. Which he was. Dean groaned and pushed his tongue inside of Cas´ mouth and groaned again when the former angel started sucking on it. Suddenly, Cas was laying on his back, pressed into the mattress by the weight of Dean on top of him and Dean held himself up on one elbow and started to push Castiel´s sweatshirt up with the other one and suddenly they froze. Both men were breathing heavily, faces only inches apart, flushed, wide eyed, and neither had ever felt more alive.

“Now I really don´t want to go.”

Cas shuddered as he heard Dean´s voice so rough and low, desire obvious in his shaded eyes. He nearly said: “Then we won´t”, his whole body going hot as he imagined what would follow, but then the torn bodies of the victims flashed before his eyes. They couldn´t risk it.

“Neither do I. But ... lives are on the line.”

Dean sighed deeply. “I know. Let´s go.”

They got up, changed, and sorted out the weapons they were going to hide in their clothes. All the while, they shared glances, blushing and giddy. Cas had his hand already on the door handle when Dean gripped his hand and held him back.

“Cas, I”, the hunter bit his lip, but in the end, it was easier than he thought.

“I don´t want to hide anymore. I don´t want to pretend this didn´t happen. I – I want you. I want to be with you, for real.”

“Oh Dean.” Castiel turned to cup Dean´s cheek. “I wanted you since I pulled you out of hell. And I won´t stop wanting you, even when the last fiber of my being turns into dust and vanishes from this earth.”

He laid his forehead against the hunter´s. “I love you, Dean Winchester. And I want to be with you in every sense of the word.”

And it wasn´t harder than taking the first breath of fresh air after a long time underground when Dean answered. “I love you, too.”

It was Castiel who closed the distance between them and kissed Dean this time. Then he smiled more vibrant than Dean had ever seen.

“Let´s finish this hunt and go home.”

When they walked up to the Impala, they were holding hands.

***

The bar was full and loud and cheerful, and Dean enjoyed it more than he´d have thought. He held hands with Cas and ignored all dark looks about it. He drank three different kinds of beers and stopped then, before he got drunk. He played a round of pool just for the fun of it. He sat so close to Cas that their bodies touched and reveled in the glowing eyes and the easy smile of his – well, boyfriend.

They were sitting on the far end of the bar, with the wall in their back and the exit in sight. Cas´ fingers played with Dean´s and sent pleasant shivers down his spine. It reminded him a bit of the day they thought they´d die and he had taken Cas to that night club to get him laid. This night, he´d take Cas home. Well, he´d taken him home that night too, but now was different. Maybe they´d even sleep in the same bed. Maybe they´d… Cas´ voice interrupted Dean´s train of thought.

“Are you happy?”

The sentence took a moment to sink in, but then a broad smile spread on the hunter´s face. “Yeah. I really am.”  
  


Cas squeezed his hand briefly. “I am too.”

For a moment they just looked at each other. Happy. Together. Finally. A nagging feeling filled Dean and he frowned. When were they ever allowed to be happy? The last time…

Castiel felt the change in mood. “What is it, Dean?”

“I don´t know, I”, Dean lowered his eyes. “I don´t want to lose this”, he whispered.

A gentle hand lifted his chin again. “You won´t. Everything will be fine.”

They held each other’s gaze, a thousand words said without a sound. But the mood in the room changed, a lot of people got up and were ready to go. Dean sighed and leaned back, only now realizing how close they had been. “The sooner we wrap this up, the sooner we´re out of here.”

Dean threw a bundle of dollars on the bar and they left, too. Outside the pub, they were met with icy wind. The snow scrunched under their feet. Dean shuddered and buried his hands in his jacket.

“Okay, what now? Should we go together or split up?”

“I think all of the victims have been alone, so it will probably be more effective if we split up.”

Dean nodded, swallowing the bad feeling he had. Cas was experienced. He´d fought more battles than Dean could even imagine. He´d be fine.

“Right. I´ll go down that alley, you go up towards the motel, we meet up there in three hours if nothing happens.”

Cas nodded briefly, but before he went, he pulled Dean close and kissed him once again, sweet and slow.

“See you later.”

Dean swallowed and blinked rapidly. When he´d regained his balance, Cas was already on the way. The hunter turned around, the feeling of Castiel´s lips still tingling on his.

It didn´t go smooth. It didn´t take long, either. Barely twenty minutes had passed when Dean heard a silent scream of terror in the distance, from the direction in which Cas had gone. It hadn´t been Cas´ voice, but the former angel would get there much sooner that he could and suddenly, his heart was in his throat. Dean took off, skittering over the snowy streets, smashing into walls, but he didn´t slow down. He heard a gunshot and some shouting only two streets away, running even faster, lungs burning, and stumbled around the corner just in time to see Cas getting thrown into a wall and sliding down. Unmoving. Lifeless.

For a second, the whole world stopped. Dean stared at the crumpled figure and a part of him laughed humorlessly. “I knew it. I won´t ever get to keep what I have. I destroy every good thing in my life,” whispered a voice from the darkest place in his mind. “No!” It took Dean a moment to realize he´d screamed the last word. This wasn´t supposed to happen! They were supposed to be happy; they were supposed to be free, they … Then his gaze turned towards the dark figure that had thrown Cas through the air like a rag doll. And his vision turned red.

He emptied his magazine into the body of the creature. It wailed, but still moved, so Dean took his silver and iron knifes and jumped into close combat. He sliced and stabbed and hit and kicked and he would rip this thing apart with his bare hands if he needed to, but it would curse the day it had taken Castiel away from him again. Dean didn´t feel the claws of the monster on his skin and the smell of the blood dripping from his face and he didn´t realize that his attacks were in vain. He just wanted it to suffer like he did.

Something wrapped their arms around his chest from behind and pulled him back. Dean panicked and tried to cut himself free, but then a very familiar voice shouted in his ear: “Dean, stop! This doesn´t work, stop!” Dean went slack and let himself be pulled away; all fight left him in an instant. He lived! Castiel lived! The creature hissed at him, glowing eyes staring at them for a moment before it vanished into the darkness.

Cas let go and spun Dean around, eyes skimming over his face and body to check for injuries. “Are you okay? Are you hurt?” Dean opened his mouth to answer and started crying.

Castiel wrapped him in a tight embrace and whispered wonderful, gentle words into his hair. Dean clung to him as if his life depended on it, sobbing into his neck and it took a long time before he realized that he repeated the words “you´re alive, you´re alive” again and again, and even then, it took a long time for him to stop. Slowly, his tears subsided and he felt slightly embarrassed, but not enough to let go. Castiel seemed to be happy to hold him. However, Dean started to feel his body tremble and his arms and chest burned. He drew back and winced. Castiel looked down at his arms and his eyes widened. “You _are_ hurt!”

“It´s nothing. But you, I thought you – you weren´t moving and I” Dean hid his face in his hands. “Dammit, one might think I´d be used to this after a lifetime of hunting. Son of a bitch!”

Cas squeezed his shoulder. “It´s okay. It´s different now, I know. Please let us go back so I can take care of you.”

“But what about you? Are you okay?”

Castiel simply shrugged. “I´m a bit sore and my head hurts, but it´s not bleeding and I´ll be fine. I was mostly disoriented, and then you came and before I knew it, you tried to rip that thing to shreds with your bare hands.”

Dean blushed and looked down, but Castiel took his hand and he let his angel lead him home.

***

When they turned on the lights in the motel room, Castiel blanched. He helped Dean take of his torn, bloody jacket and ushered him into the bathroom. He sat Dean down on a chair and ignored all protests when he took a towel and the first aid kit and got to work.

Castiel wiped the blood from Dean´s face with gentle strokes and cleaned his wounds with careful hands. There were several long, deep gashes along Dean´s arms and some on his chest, too. Blood seeped out of them and Dean started to sway as the adrenaline subsided and the blood loss made itself known. Castiel´s eyes were bright with worry and he went out for a moment to snatch some water and a granola bar. He helped Dean lift the glass to his lips and take a bite, again ignoring the weak protest entirely, one steadying hand always on Dean´s shoulder.

“Do you want to lay down while I´m stitching these?”

“We´re gonna ruin the bedsheet.”

“I don´t care.”

“I don´t want to get up.”

Castiel took out the needle and the dental floss. “I´m sorry, I won´t be very good at it.”

“It´s okay.”

Dean closed his eyes and only hissed a few times when Castiel´s clumsy stiches pulled at his skin. Castiel apologized every time. When he was finished, he covered the sutures and wrapped the hunter´s arms and chest in gauze. Then, he leaned his head against Dean´s knee and stayed there.

Dean got dizzy when he looked down, so he kept his eyes closed, but started to pet Cas´ head with the hand that hurt less.

“Are you okay?”

“I don’t want to do this anymore.”

Dean tensed up and his eyes flew open, dizzyness be damned.

“What do you-“

“I don´t want to be scared to lose you all the time. I don´t want your blood on my hands and live in the constant fear of something coming and taking you away from me.”

Dean met Castiel´s eyes. They were shining in an astonishing shade of blue, wet with tears.

“I don´t want to hunt anymore. I will come with you, but I do –“

“Neither do I.”

They both stayed silent for a few seconds, the weight of the moment sinking in.

“I don´t know how else to live. But I want to try, because I´ve had enough, too. The world is saved, we are free, we´re no longer under Chuck´s control. Someone else can take care of the monsters now, there are enough hunters out there. Don´t get me wrong, I want to be in touch, I want to help. But I don´t want to fight on the front anymore. I´ve earned that. We´ve earned that.”

Castiel got up and took Dean´s face in his hands. There were still tears on his face, and the crow´s feet around the corners of his eyes wrinkled as he smiled. Dean had never seen him more ethereal, more angelic. More beautiful.

“Yes, we did. We did.”

Castiel helped Dean up and tried to steady him on his way to the bed without touching his wounds. He got another glass of water and the pain killers, swallowed two himself, made Dean swallow two and got out of his clothes. Dean still got dizzy when he looked down, so Cas took of his shoes and helped him out of his jeans. Dean was tempted to crack a joke about Cas finally undressing him, but the seriousness of the moment asked for silence. They lay down, both in one bed, without question, without talking, Cas behind Dean. He pressed his chest against Dean´s back, one arm under his head, the other wrapped around his waist, careful to avoid the covered injuries. Dean had thought he´d have trouble sleeping the first night in the same bed, but Cas´ closeness was incredibly calming and pulled him under before his brain could come up with even one reason why this was anything but good.

***

It took some time for Castiel to wake up. The first thing that he realized was the source of warmth before him and he pressed closer, a contended sigh on his lips. Hair tickled his nose and he rubbed it against soft skin. He dozed off again for some time, before the events of the night before caught up with him and he tensed. Slowly, Castiel opened his eyes. Deans head rested on his arm, which had gone a bit numb, but he could still feel the warm breaths ghost over his skin. Dean´s body rose and fell gently and suddenly, Cas felt like crying. Out of gratitude that he was allowed to be here and hold Dean in his arms. Out of sadness over the wasted time, over all the tragedy in their lives. Out of happiness. Out of love. He buried his nose in Dean´s neck again. His voice was raw with emotion when he whispered:  
  
“I love you so much, Dean Winchester.”

Dean tensed, but before Cas could say anything else, he answered: “I love you, too.”

Castiel let go so Dean could turn around and reveled in the sight of his sleepy eyes and tousled hair.

Dean smiled tiredly and caressed his cheek. “Did you sleep well? Does your head hurt?”

Castiel leaned into Dean´s hand and nearly forgot that he was supposed to answer a question.

“No. Well, it´s throbbing a little bit, but nothing that´d worry me. How are your injuries?”  
  


Dean wanted to dismiss it, but he decided otherwise. “They sting. But I´m not worried either, doesn´t feel hot or infected or something.”

Castiel smiled, grateful for Dean´s honesty. With an insecure gaze, Dean leaned forward and hesitated, before he closed the distance between them and pressed his lips to Cas´ in an open-mouthed kiss. Cas melted under his mouth, body pressing closer and lips opening to let his tongue flick out. He was very careful to not put pressure on Dean´s injured chest and arms, but his hands were all over his face and back and Dean felt like floating, time and space and purpose just disappearing, until his whole world had reduced to this room and the warmth and scent of Castiel all around him.

It was a long time later when they pulled back to catch their breath, faces still so close together that they shared the same air. Dean thought he might explode from the magnitude of his feelings swiveling around just under his skin. When he opened his eyes again, the first thing he saw were Cas´ damp, red, parted lips and his heart jumped. Cas´ fingers played in his hair and he was so comfortable that he thought he might just fall back asleep, but his grumbling stomach obviously had other plans. Cas chuckled.

“Time for breakfast?”

Dean huffed. “Yeah. And a call with Sammy.”

“And some more painkillers.”

Dean didn´t argue. They got up and Cas got out to get coffee and breakfast while Dean struggled with his clothes, his injured arms hurting and stinging. With a curse, the hunter swallowed more pills and started his laptop. He dug through some of the databases, but nothing quite fit the profile of the monster. The date at the bottom of the screen seamed to double in size every time he dismissed an idea. The 23d of December. Two days until Christmas. If they didn´t manage to wrap this up soon, he´d have to stay here over the holidays with Cas. It would still be one of, if not the best Christmas of his life, but he´d been looking forward to celebrating with Sam, Jack and Eileen. And maybe visit Jody and the girls. The lock clicked and Dean´s hand flew instinctively towards his gun when Cas entered the room.

“Find something?”

Dean silently shook his head.

Castiel set the coffee and breakfast on the table and kissed the top of Dean´s head.

“We´ll make it for Christmas. Have you called Sam yet? Maybe he knows something?”

“Breakfast first.”

After indulging in coffee, sandwiches, some muffins and comfortable silence, Dean called Sam. It was Eileen who picked up.

“Hey Dean.”

“Hey Eileen. Is Sam around?”

“No, I´m gonna get – are you hurt?”

Her gaze swept over Dean´s gauze-covered arms and the bandages that peeked out from under his T-Shirt.

“Nah, it´s just a scratch.”

Dean´s eyes wandered over to Castiel, who threw Dean an incredulous look.

“What?”

“It´s not just a scratch, Dean.”

“I mean, I´ve had worse. _Much_ worse.”

“That doesn´t mean that you should take this lightly.”

Eileen just grinned and went to the kitchen to get Sam. When they came back, Dean nearly threw himself off his chair with laughter. Sam wore an apron and wiped his hands with a kitchen towel, flour in his hair and dough on his forearms.

“Shut up, jerk!”

“No, forget it, bitch. I´m never gonna let you live this down. Man, you look like Mary Poppins!”

“Mary Poppins was a very wise and gentle…”

“Cas, I know. That doesn´t mean that I won´t tease my brother with it.”

Castiel held his gaze with a pointed look, until Sam cleared his throat.

“Guys, if you just called to insult me and bicker with each other, again, I´m going back to my cookies.”

Dean blushed and opened and closed his mouth a few times. Cas took over.

“We´ve encountered the monster and we can´t figure out what it is.”

Sam got serious immediately. “What happened?” Eileen tapped his shoulder and signed something. Sam´s jaw clenched, and his worried eyes turned towards Dean.

“You are hurt?”

Dean grumbled and waved his hand dismissively, which brought his gauze-wrapped arm into Sam´s sight and made him wince.

“It´s no- it´s not bad. A few gashes, nothing wild. Stop fretting.” He turned towards Cas. “Both of you.”

“Okay.” Sam and Dean stayed silent for a moment, a lifetime of shared trauma and injuries between them. Then Sam cleared his throat. “Okay, what happened?”

After listening to their story, minus certain parts that Dean and Cas kept to themselves, Sam rubbed his jaw, deep in thought.

“So, that thing attacks people who come home from celebrations at night. Nothing connecting the victims, human-shaped, not vocal, claws.” He stayed silent for a moment. “I have a hunch. I´m gonna call you later.”

They ended the call.

Dean sighed deeply and Castiel wrapped his arm around him. “What are we gonna do now?” Dean shrugged. “Hulu or Netflix?”

They were into the third episode of the Witcher when Sam called again.

“So get this. There is a creature in Norse mythology that fits your description. It´s called a draugr. It´s a kind of undead and it´s said that it attacks people who are making noise in the time around midwinter.”

“That fits! How do you kill it?”

“Well, it´s immune to most injuries, as you said. You have to behead it, lay it´s head at its ass and set it on fire.”

“We have to – lay it´s head at its ass? What the hell, man?”

“Look, I didn´t come up with that. Just do it, burn it. Or salt and burn it, won´t do any harm.”

Dean nodded. “Well, if we can get it tonight, we might make it for Christmas.”

“Yeah, burn that son of a bitch and come home.”

“Dean smiled softly. “Yeah, we´ll do that. See ya, Sammy.”

“Bye Dean, bye Cas.”

Both of them leaned back in their chairs as the call ended. For a moment, they were silent, then Dean covered his face with his hand and chuckled.

“Son of a bitch. A draugr. After defeating god, we failed to kill a goddamn zombie.”

Castiel laughed lightly. “Well, it failed to kill us, too, so I call that a tie. We´ll go and get it tonight and then we can go home to Sam, Eileen, and Jack. And celebrate Christmas.”

“Sounds good.”

Dean raised his arms to stretch the sore muscles and winced in pain. “Okay, so, it´s barely half past two, so what are we gonna do with the rest of the day? And will there be a party tonight that we can attend?”

It didn´t take long to find out that there was a Christmas-themed ball in the town hall. The tickets were already sold and there was a guest list.

“I don´t think we actually have to sneak in, we can wait outside until it´s late and people are leaving. Then we´ll go and get this bastard.”

“I agree, but with one condition.”

Dean lifted one eyebrow.

“We´ll not gonna split up again.” Castiel´s eyes were hard. “I won´t leave you to hunt on your own when you´re that hurt. We´re gonna stick together and I will fight. If something happens, you can still intervene. But I won´t leave you, no matter how much you´re gonna argue that you´re-“

“I wasn´t going to.”

Surprised, Castiel tilted his head.

“I would have suggested it myself. I think we´re better together. And I want to finish our last hunt together.”

Cas´ lip trembled and he gripped Dean´s hand tight. “Okay. Yeah. Our last hunt.”

None of them could tell who leaned in first, but suddenly their lips touched and then there was nothing else for a long time.

***

As it turned out, there was a small Christmas market in town. They took the car to town and wandered around aimlessly. The sun stood low and glittered on the snow. Dean and Cas looked at the goods that were laid out in the booths, choosing matching cups with printed moose for Sam and Eileen and a wood carving set for Jack. Night fell early and they got some mulled wine to warm them while they wandered around. Dean tasted every sweet food that he could get his hands on, until he felt slightly nauseous with all the sugar, but it was such a minor inconvenience that it was drowned out by the bliss of spending time with Castiel. They talked about the places they had visited, their favorite films and actors, which books they had read, and which bands Dean had seen live. Normal things. Everyday things. Dean could picture them living a domestic, calm, quiet life, just like this. He couldn´t wait.

In the end, they sat on a dock, looking out over Lake Michigan. They nursed their warm cups in one hand and Dean leaned his head on Cas shoulder. The reflections of the city lights and the half-moon glittered on the water. Dean sighed deeply and Castiel wrapped his arm around his shoulder. His voice was quiet when he asked:

“Are you happy?”

“Yeah. You?”

“Very.”

No more words were said. No more words were needed.

***

The ball was supposed to start at eight o´clock, so they returned to the car and parked it in sight of the town hall´s main entry. They shared a thermos with coffee and a blanket, huddling together against the cold. The radio played quietly in the background. For the most part they stayed silent, brief comments on the people entering the hall or about their plan the only conversations. When it got late, they left the car and lurked around the corner of the hall to be ready to go to work when the mood in the room changed and people left.

The music and chatter were audible, and they blew into their hands and stepping from one foot to the other to keep warm. Dean started to get tired and a bit cranky. The music had changed from lively rock and pop songs to something slower and cheesier and he was ready to complain when Castiel stretched out his hand. Dean stared at it blankly.

“Would you care to dance?”

“What? I can´t … Where did _you_ learn to dance?”

Castiel shrugged. “I haven´t. But I´ve seen people do it and it doesn´t seem to be too hard. I don´t plan to dance a classic waltz, so, would you humor me?”

And he honest to goodness bowed down and offered his hand. Dean blushed and rolled his eyes, but he took Cas´ hand. The former angel smiled and pulled the hunter close. He wrapped his other hand around Dean´s middle and Dean placed his hand on Cas´ shoulder. They swayed to the sound of a slow, sweet song and Dean found himself immersed in the music and Cas´ touch and he closed his eyes. Castiel hummed along and they circled around with small steps. At some point, Dean leaned his head on Cas´ forehead and they stayed like that, dancing slowly and sharing the same breath, visible between their mouths.

“I love you.”

Dean felt Cas´ hand tighten around his. “I love you, too.”

They kept on dancing a while longer until the music genre changed again, indicating that people would either leave or stay until the early hours of the morning. Slowly, Dean pulled his hand from Cas´, kissing him chastely before he took a step back. He took a deep breath.

“I think it´s time.”

Castiel nodded. He pulled his machete and they set out to circle the streets around the town house.

In the end, it was fairly easy. They checked the dark streets, and kept an eye on several attendants of the party until they were home. It took no longer than an hour until they took a turn into a dark alley and were met with the sight of a tall figure with glowing eyes that growled at them, lifting clawed hands, and launching itself at them. Dean took a step back and Castiel charged with the elegance of a lifetime of practice. He dodged the draugr´s swing and beheaded it with a forceful swing of his machete. Afterwards, they stayed still for a moment. Dean´s heartbeat hadn´t even picked up that much.

“So, that´s that I guess.”

Cas looked at him with his head tilted, his bloodied weapon still in hand. “Our last hunt.”

Suddenly, Dean was scared. Hunting was familiar. Hunting was what he´d done for his whole life. Everything else had always felt like a farce, a charade, playing domestic because it was what he´d been supposed to do. He didn´t even realize how Cas came closer, to wrapped up in his epiphany.

“Hey, Dean, look at me. We´ll figure it out. And as you said, we can keep track and help other hunters. Not everything has to change.”

Dean nodded. “I know. We make it up as we go, huh?”

“Exactly.”

A deep breath forced its way out of Dean´s no longer constricted chest. “Okay. I´m gonna get the car. We burn that son of a bitch and tomorrow, we´ll head home.”

Dark smoke rose over the sizzling, burning body of the draugr. Dean held Castiel´s hand. They waited until only ashes remained. Then, they made their way to the impala, without haste. They had time.

***

Dean and Cas checked out of the motel at ten o´clock in the morning. They took turns driving, only pausing for gas and snacks. Castiel insisted on listening to a channel with Christmas carols when he drove, reminding Dean of the ancient rule he´d established himself:

“Driver picks the music, Dean.”

The hunter grumbled until “Driving home for Christmas” played on the radio. By the end of the day, even Castiel knew the lyrics by heart.

They held hands while driving and slept with their heads leaned against each other’s shoulders. When evening came, Dean cracked a joke about riding off into the sunset and they recalled their case in Dodge City. Castiel admitted how much he´d wanted to kiss Dean when he came back from the empty the first time. Dean admitted how long he´d been in love with Castiel.

When they parked the car in the garage, the clock jumped to midnight.

They smiled at each other and squeezed their hands once again before they left the car. Duffle bags over their shoulders, they entered the bunker and stopped in their tracks when they saw the library. There was a Christmas tree in the corner. Fairy lights everywhere. A sock for everyone hanging over the fireplace. A plate with cookies on the table, with a handwritten note from Sam: “Welcome home.”

Dean and Castiel took in the scenery. Then they turned towards each other. The lights around them glittered in their eyes.

“Merry Christmas, Cas.”

“Merry Christmas, Dean.”

**Author's Note:**

> If someone is interested, the song I listened to while writing the dancing scene is "Start of Time" by Gabrielle Aplin.


End file.
